Tag: life is a page turner

Bookish

Why You Don’t Have Bookish Friends

India

All the time you can find posts of people saying that they don’t feel part of the bookish community, or how they don’t have friends and each time I see this I roll my eyes. Sorry, I do. I’m always left wondering what are you doing to garner friends in the bookish community. Are you expecting people to just “come up to you” on the internet and just be your friend? If so, you need to change your expectations. Also a lot of the friendships that you see happening on the internet did not happen overnight! They took months sometimes years to become what you see on the internet! It’s okay to be jealous, but it’s not okay to let it taint your view of the entire community. As a friend told me, find your tribe. They are there, but they’re just spread out a bit.

In order to have a friend, you have to be a friend. You have to be willing to put in the time to try and foster relationships and you also have to understand that not every person on the internet is meant to be your friend.  Building platonic relationships take just as much work as building romantic relationships. Are you commenting on their content and doing it in such a way that leads to more discussion or is it just a “Love your video! New subscriber!”? Also, understand that it’s easy to get distracted on the internet and that just because it seems like people are ignoring doesn’t mean they are. They might have seen the notification and just forgot to respond to it. That happens! I do it all the time and then it’s like a week later I’m responding. I’m sorry, but it’s true. Sometimes I take a peek at something, but don’t have the time to respond right away and then because the notification is gone I forget about it.

You also can’t expect to be given everything and constantly take from others without giving something in return. That’s toxic. It’s hurtful plain and simple. Also, don’t try to become friends with someone in order to build yourself up. That’s rude. You also have to respect people’s boundaries! If people say they just can’t do it right now, let them have some space to breathe. The internet only shows so much of people’s lives, and sometimes we assume we know more when we really only know a fraction.

I posted a video on my youtube channel about this, that is not nearly as blunt as this post, but I felt like the blog needed some tough love and youtube needed something a little nicer. Feel free to watch! What have you done to build relationships in the book community? What is some of the advice that you have for others? Let’s talk down in the comments! Until next time,

Keep Turning the Pages

India

Bookish

Do I Only Read When I’m Depressed?

India
I haven’t been reading a lot lately, which isn’t a bad thing, but it is different. If you follow me on Instagram (if you don’t you should just click here!) you would have seen a post about me talking about feeling more happy. I have noticed that with that light feeling that I’ve had, I haven’t wanted to sit in my bed all day with the windows closed and read my books. Now I haven’t given up reading at all, I just have not sequestered myself to the pillows. Who knows it might just be because I haven’t started a book in awhile that has excited me. As I looked into why I haven’t been crushing my reading goals lately, I really had to look into myself and my own moods and see what was going on.
The conclusion in my own non scientific experiment was that I was not feeling the depression that was weighing me down in so many things. Now I want to be out and moving around and taking more pictures of books than I want to read them. I still have the desire to read them, but I don’t have the desire to sit still, so I need to use some of those audible credits it sounds like. As I was finding this out about my myself I then started to look at the book community.
A lot of the book community contains people who have titled themselves as introverts, which is fine, and that’s why they enjoy reading so much, but also why they love the book community. It gives them a place to socialize without having to socialize. Basically socializing on their own terms. There has also been a lot of discussion and talks about mental health going on in the book community as of late, which I think is fantastic, but they’re more discussions of people saying that they have a mental health issue and bringing light to that. Other than a chemical imbalance that some people face with their mental health, I want to explore what other reasons why a lot of book people feel down. For me, it was a birth control that spun my mental health all out of wack. If I was titling myself I would call myself an extroverted introvert. I can make conversation with anyone at any time and it doesn’t bother me at all, but I also need that space to be away from people some time.
I also wanted to explore the thought of reading for escapism. I know that I have said that in videos and looking back at that, I’m not even sure if that’s what I really meant to say. I always meant reading for escapism in terms of escaping to some place new, and now I think the new word I was trying to come up with is exploring. I feel like I read to explore new places, but not necessarily to escape from the place I’m at. I love where I’m at in life even with all of the mixed feelings and emotions, but it took time to get there. Sometimes I fear for the book community and the fact that too many people are escaping from life and not dealing with life, but everyone has their journey to get to where they need to be.
So my questions starts to become, do I only read when I’m depressed and how do I read in the same volume when I’m happy?  Or do I need to change my expectations of myself and not put reading pressure on myself. These are some of the questions that I have and I don’t know any of the answers. I know that I need to take it a day at a time and still continue to read what I enjoy and have fun with it. Do you find your mood determines your reading? Until next time,
Keep turning the Pages
India
Coffee Break

Wedding Wednesday | So Now What?

India
First things first DON’T PANIC!
I know you’re really excited, but you’re coming down off the high of being engaged. If you were like me you had some idea it was coming, or you might have been completely surprised! Either way is fantastic, but now it’s time to get to planning, or at least thinking about the wedding.
You’ve got a million ideas going a mile a minute, but you’re not sure what fits you and your significant other. Here are some things that I would recommend you do next to try and figure out where you want to see your wedding.
First of course talk to your significant other and find out how each of you want to celebrate and how can you compromise? For example and especially being an interracial couple we can have some very different tastes. He would like to be very rural and I would like to be in the city, but we have to compromise somewhere, and make it fit both of our tastes.
Second, set up an account on The Knot ( no, this is not affiliated) and do the “taste test” as I like to call it, where it can help you figure out what kind of style you see your dream wedding going. I don’t like their search feature very much for looking for venues, but that’s a whole different topic. I did like that it could put what “theme” I wanted into words. It can be hard if you’re not having a complete theme like Harry Potter or the Roaring 20s, to put your theme into words.
Third, maybe start a Pinterest board to put things there of your vibe or theme. Not any and all things that you see on the internet that has to deal with weddings. That will not help you feel less overwhelmed! People do a lot of comparisons of weddings, try not to fall into that because just because someone else can afford to do something doesn’t mean that you can or should try to make to happen.
Finally, remember to take it one day at a time in these beginning phases. People are going to keep asking you when is the big day and it does get annoying, but they mean well. Just remind that you just got engaged and still have to pick. Also I was told I couldn’t tell people they weren’t invited to wedding on social media…so I guess don’t do that either.  Have fun do a little bit every day, and take it one step at a time. Don’t think of the little details of the big day until you have the big details taken care of. You can do this. What are some good next steps that have helped you out? Let me know! Until next time,
Keep turning the pages
India
Thinking about all the things that have to be done now.
Bookish

Romance Was the Genre I Didn’t Know I Needed

India
I have always considered me to be a fantasy reader with a little bit of contemporary to balance it out, but then romance came in and it slapped me in the face and was like “where the hell have you been?” I had no answer for it.
I started getting into romance because I was trying to finish my reading goals for the Goodreads challenge. I read The Kiss Quotient and then I had to read more, then I read The Hating Game and I was hooked. I need to find more romance reads, so I hit up my favorite romance booktuber and her Goodreads page, so I could get some book recommendations. From there I started to dive into the erotic, the smutty, the light, and the sports romance. There are so many levels to romance! I was able to choose what I wanted for the mood that I was in and if I was in a kind of fantasy mood, but didn’t need all of the fantasy, there were paranormal romances as well.
I don’t have much to say about it, other than it was there when I needed it and that I need to stop looking down on the romance world like I was doing. It made me have a deeper respect for the romance readers and it also helped me know what I liked and what I wanted from a readers stand point. If you haven’t read romance, go ahead and give it a try. You never know, it might be your new favorite thing. If you don’t know where to start then head over to Stephanie’s goodreads page where she has all of the romance books she’s read broken down into different categories and find something that peaks your interest. I’ve read a few and could try and recommend some to you as well. Just ask down below! I hope you find something new and exciting, but until next time,
Keep turning the Pages
India
Coffee Break

The Booktube Boyfriend Tag!

India

So, I made Eric be in a video with me….

I might have bribed him to do it…

I’m pretty sure he loves me … hahahah

No, I’m just kidding I know he loves because he was willing to do this fun and exciting video with me to see how much he knows about Booktube and what I do over here.

Of course a lot of the pictures you see of me on social media have been taken by him, as he so graciously becomes my photographer for however many photos that I need. Trust me no grumbling there – read lots of grumbling and India we don’t have time for this -and he takes as many pictures that I need.

Here’s the two of us together! Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram where you get to see more of our Swirly Relationship. The video is here and down below! If you have any questions for us leave them below! Until next time!

Keep Turning the Pages

India